Kind of funny, a few days after I wrote the last blog I had strong dreams of going home- you just never know what the next day is going to bring. One day you will love being in a foreign culture, working a language that you really dont know so well (and even laugh with yourself about it); but maybe the next day you long for understadning of the language and are made to feel badly that you cant understand and a big part of what you want in your heart is to be at home. But I think the glimmer of hope there though is that its only a big part its not my entire heart.

I feel like I want a place to retreat, a place where I can release. I'm not sure what I need to release what Im holding so muchly inside of myself but I feel weight from my thoughts from the sights from understanding from lack of understanding. only a few more days and I will journey to a week in nepal, hopes of retreat/clear vision happening there

Kolkata has been an especially busy place as weve had visitors coming in and out of our home the past few weeks, and just a lot of things to do during the week. language class, SB training, going to visit the red light area, finishing some school projects to turn in this week.

Today were going again, like every week to visit with the girls. To shake their hands, give them a smile a hello and maybe some small conversation. Its hard to see them standing there waiting for customers. I think i'm beginning to internalize why its important for us to go there- maybe just for those few moments we can talk with them they will catch a glipmse of who they really are rather than what their society tells them they are. they are not what they do. they are significant women who deserve to be valued. pray for them, some of them are my age some of them are younger. forced to live a life that no one should have to live